Happy Halloween! I don’t know. Should we happy because of this? I don’t think so. Today is the time of ghost! The time of terror! The time of spooky and creepy thing! And I think we should be scared of it. So, Scary Halloween! Whatever
Here is my idea of Halloween. Halloween is racist for “green” ghost. Why? Because green ghost are usually stupid. Example:
Troll, he is obviously stupid.
Goblin, he is small. His brain size must be not big enough to think.
And Frankenstein, he doesn’t even have a brain!
See, Halloween is racist! Because of Halloween, we think that all green people are bad. In fact, we have Hulk who always be our superhero. He is green and he is not bad! Stop racist to green people!
Now you already know how racist Halloween is. Do you still want to celebrate it? I disagree with you. Let’s celebrate another thing. Like, we have badass female minister who slaps media like sh*t with her tattoo.
She awesome! She is smoking. She has tattoo. And she has a scary face also. If you celebrate this woman, today would be a real HAPPY HALLOWEEN. But if you don’t respect this woman because of her tattoo, it means that you have problem with her skin, it means that you are racist!
Stop being racist! Just be friend with everyone!
#ShareTheLove #ShareThisBlog #Shalom1Jiwa
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What do you remember about high school? For MKM, there was a pastor who used to teach religion in MKM’s high school. He was brown (his skin and also his “pastoral” outfit). And he had a room in the middle of the school. His room was made of glasses. So, it was like watching a bear in its cage.
He was not a good teacher in the classroom. MKM didn’t get anything from his lesson. He only made joke in the classroom. Even in his final test, his question was a joke! Here is one of his questions:
When Israelites was in the dessert, GOD gave them ……… to eat.
a. Manna bread (Roti Manna, this is the correct one)
b. Roasted bread (Roti Bakar, this is absurd)
c. Bread life (this should be Sari Roti, but to make it English, MKM use other brand)
d. Bread talk (this should be Roti Boy, it is another Indonesian brand too)
We didn’t need to study for his test. His answer is too obvious. Who didn’t get 100 is stupid!
It was him in the classroom. But outside of the classroom, he is a Saint. He was like Santa, but in brown version. He was fat too (but he is good at soccer, I don’t know why). The difference between him and Santa is that Santa always gone after Christmas. But he was always there, in his cage. No. I mean, in his room.
Every morning he came to classrooms and greeted those who had birthday in that day. He prayed for them and gave them blessing. When students did something wrong, he would scold them while saying, “Hei! Setan kau! Bertobatlah!” (Hey! You little demon! Repent on your sins!). They had to kneel and promise to not doing it anymore.
He knew every students by their name (it is always about 1000 students in my high school and he knew them all). Maybe it was because he always scolded somebody every day. If you were his student, maybe your ear would grow longer because he loved to play with your ear.
He was so kind. When student had a trouble, instead to come to the counselor, student prefers to come to him. He was a good listener. Even though he didn’t give any good solution (even he would just mock them), students still want to come to his room, which is like a cage.
This pastor just passed away. One thing that MKM learned from him is to be a Real Christian, talking a lot about bible is not enough. It is better if you never talk about bible but you do what Jesus do. It is my Santa, my brown Santa.
Bye Romo Sixtus. Pray for us. I will make you proud!
#ByeRmSixtus #ShareTheLove #SetanKau
MKM admit that MKM is a messy and disgusting person. If you see MKM’s table, it would be like sh*t. There are plastics, unused papers, fossils, etc. It is just too many garbage there. If there is a scavenger came to MKM’s table, he would be a millionaire.
MKM live in a dormitory. MKM’s room is full of people like that. Yes! They are also very messy. Someone in MKM’s room even put all of his stuffs on his bed, and then he sleeps on the floor. It is like he worships his stuffs.
Can you imagine that kind of room? It smells like hell! It is like full of methane gas. So if there is a generator in MKM’s room, maybe it can turn on the light of the whole dormitory.
Every month, our dormitory gives awards for the most clean and neat room. Also, they give punishment for the most mess room. Here is the punishment: the first and second dirty room must clean the toilet. The third must clean the laundry room.
And of course!!!! MKM got number one!!! The dirtiest messiest room…..!!!! YEEEYYY!!!! SMELLL YEAH!!!! And guess what? This is the second punishment we’ve got. YEEEAAAAHH!!!! (sh*t!)
MKM thinks that it is obvious. Why? It is like the room members have a limit of clean. Even though we try harder, maybe we will just get the laundry room. We just simply CAN NOT BE CLEAN AND NEAT.
Anyway. We are room 106. The f*cking thing is that our neighbor, room 105 got the runner up for the most clean and neat room. MKM is suspicius, when they swept their room, they moved the garbage from their room into our room. So they will win and we will lose.
If that is true, MKM will not take revenge. MKM just offer them to have the responsibility together. Let’s clean the toilet together. But of course, our room will have more duty in cleaning the toilet. 106 will supervise and give 105 order, 105 just need to clean the toilet. Just it. 2:1. That is fair!
Well, as a human, we need to realize that we are not perfect. There are many things that we need to work on to be a better person. MKM learnt to be cleaner. You? What will you do? Is there any simple thing that you will do to change your life? MKM challenges you to be a better person!
#ShareTheLove #Shalom1Jiwa #ShareThisBlog
Lately, MKM’s facebook is full of spam. MKM’s friends sent MKM those, accidentally. The spam is like “who are your closest friends?” it’s disgusting! it annoyed MKM. Thanks for that, MKM can’t promote my new post in facebook because MKM’s post drown in those spam! Thank you!
Now, do you really believe that you can judge which is your true friend through stupid madafaka machine? This spam will never occur on your facebook if you don’t try the apps. But, once you try, you will disturb your “5 top best friends” with your tag and post which is very annoying. And now, MKM sees that many people send their friend those things which means many people try that apps which means many people believe on that sh*t.
Are you that depressed?Are you that lonely? then, you are looking for your true friend…. well it is alay… MKM can’t find the English of alay. But you are alay when you keep doing stupid unimportant things and you think that it is funny while in fact it is creepy and annoying!
there are many Alay in MKM’s dorm. Those who tried to find who is their future husband/wife, when they will die, their next job, the movie that similar with their life THROUGH FACEBOOK APPS. do you really believe on that apps? it is heretic!
If you have friend, and that friend’s mouth is beside your ears, and he keeps talking about the same thing, even it is a good thing such as “You are my best friend, you are my best friend, you are my best friend” six times per hour, you will hate him don’t you? that is how your spam works! FIX IT!!! for God Sake!
Stop being alay guys. it is not healthy for your society. one alay in society is like virus. it ruins all society. and it is worse than ebola or HIV. it kills the society.
MKM 100% sure that all your 5 best friend should be hate you since you sent them those spam. you need apologize to them. Give them gift. a real gift, not ninja saga gift (which is alay too).
be normal guys. don’t be alay!
#ShareTheLove #ShareThisBlog #Shalom1Jiwa
Do you know about indigo? Indigo is a talent that makes you have some supernatural powers (MKM, 2014). Some said that indigo people can see the ghost, read the future, and read the newspaper. But, they are not dangerous as long as they are not doing fire bending and conquer the world.
MKM thinks that become an indigo is interesting. Some said that become an indigo is a burden. But now, MKM has things that worth to try if you are an indigo. Check it out.
Indigo usually can see the ghost. And usually, ghosts are passive creature (creature? Whatever). That will be boring. So, maybe you can attract them by wink at them. Or you can have a selfie with them. Or maybe you can ask them some questions such as, “Is your dad a police?” (Papa kamu polisi ya?).
2. Writing a ghost biography
Some indigo said that they were followed by ghost. MKM thinks it is because you guys are too defensive. Try to be the offensive one! Follow the ghost! And write a biography of that ghost! You can give the title like: “Daily Life of Pocong” or “Tuyul: I wanna go to School” or “Like Mother Like Kunti.” Or you can make this book: “The Truth Revealed” by following the ghost of Soeharto.
Ngepet is when someone transform his human form into animal (in Indonesia, pig is the best choice, I don’t know why). For Indigo, doing such a thing should be easy. Indonesian people usually do this to steal from someone else. So, if indigo do this, they will be very rich. But, there are some people that already ngepet everyday but not getting rich. Apparently, they steal from their own wallet.
4. Sell the test questions
Some indigo have ability to see the future. use that ability to see your next test questions. you can sell it. you save the society! sell the wrong question to your enemy. you win the competition!
Anyway. become an indigo is hard. this article is just for fun, no offense. if you have an indigo friend, support him. he needs you. cie…..
#ShareTheLove #ShareThisBlog #Shalom1Jiwa